Caring for Others

October 20, 2009

Tags: sandwich generation, caregiver

Like many people in the Baby Boomer generation, I am also part of the Sandwich Generation: those sandwiched between raising their children and caring for their elderly parents. People who are sandwiched know how difficult this can be at times. It can also be a wonderful joy!

I wish that I could say that being sandwiched didn't leave me feeling stuck in the middle like a slice of roast beef. Especially when my loyalties are torn between who to care for first: child, parent, husband, me.

Actually, that's typically the order in which it falls. Like so many women, caring for me tags along, bringing up the rear. My time is chewed up (like that slice of beef mentioned earlier) by tasks meant to help or support someone else in my family.

Don't get me wrong -- my family wants me to take care of me, they encourage it by giving me time to walk or exercise, by giving me time to write/read.

No, I am the problem, not them. I feel guilty if I don't do the things that I know will help or support them.

Sitting down to read a novel sends my subconscience into panic: what did I forget to do? Pay that bill for Dad? Talk to my daughter about her activities? Did my son ever finish that task for college?

The result? I jump up and do whatever the task is that's popped into my little brain like some kind of a jack-in-the-box.

Is it just me? I wonder how other caregivers out there belonging to the exclusive sandwich generation club deal with the conflicting priorities. Any advice?

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